Looking Through the Glass

How we regard ourselves is arguable one of the single most impactful things in our lives. If we think ourselves small and powerless, we are likely to behave small and powerless; if we think of ourselves as powerful and in-charge, we are likely to act thus. What is interesting is that it is not a matter of how we really are, necessarily, but how we understand ourselves. In looking in the mirror, we have to recognize that we don't really see ourselves. That is, we cannot see the inner workings of our body much less our soul and so, there is only a representation of ourselves and not the whole thing.

Paul, the apostle and mystic, has some words about this topic. When discussing love and the powerful, central role it plays in a Christian’s worldview, he mentions keeping a handle on reality.

Now our knowledge is partial and incomplete, and even the gift of prophecy reveals only part of the whole picture. But when the time of perfection comes, these partial things will become useless. When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things. Now we see things imperfectly, like puzzling reflections in a mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity. All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely.

                        -Paul, the apostle, NLT

First and foremost, Paul acknowledges the true way that we exist as created things; that is, no matter how developed or sophisticated our science and philosophy, we will only ever truly know things in a partial way. Now, the empiricist might argue that we know exactly how the heart works; how it moves, what powers it, what each ventricle, atria, artery and vein does. They would be correct only to a point, however; that is, we still do not know what initiates the first electrical pulse that powers the heart. Does it come from the mother? Is it self-generated? How does a heart actually start beating? This is one, limited example, but the point is that ultimately, there is mystery in all of our knowledge and it is a mystery, Paul says, that will never be revealed until we are one with God. 

Secondly, Paul speaks of process; that is, growing up spiritually by way of a physical analogy. He says that when moving from childhood to manhood, he let go of the childish things in favor of the manly things. This isn’t to say that there was no value in childish ways; as father of two little boys, I know their ways are beautiful. What he is saying is that when one has reached man-status (in whatever way that is measured), the childish things cannot be embraced alongside the adult ways; it is an either/or. If there is one thing that is true about children is that they often think they are more mature than they are; this also should be a word of caution to us: don’t think that you are more mature than you really are. Evaluate yourself with sober eyes and realize your shortcomings; they are much easier to reconcile with when they are laid bare.

Finally, Paul looks to the end and speaks of the time when we shall know ourselves and everything else in its fullness, just as God does. It is a little strange to think that God knows us better than we know ourselves, but it is the truth. Do you know how the soul is attached to the body? Have you walked the corridors of the spirit to discover what secrets lay therein? No, only our Creator knows the depths of our person. Someday, however, we shall see ourselves as we truly are; not just past the physical, but in a larger context with all of our connections and relationships laid out like a road map. Until then, we should only strive to know God more, for that is how we learn more about ourselves and actual reality. What we see now, Paul says, is a distortion of how the world really is. We are the ghosts and beyond the veil is reality. We pray now for revelation and look forward to the time where we can be with him and him with us. There we taste the fullness of his gift; for there is no offense and, indeed, no forgiveness between God and us because there is no space or room for it; He is in us and us in Him.

So, today, pray this: that we should be with him in that fullness and see ourselves as maturing and not-arrived-yet. The truth of our lives is that they are not over yet; let us embrace the process and, in humility, see ourselves as we are to the best of our ability.

Peace,

C.M.